it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
Alex texted me. Bootycall boy #2. its like an alarm goes off once i'm single that the line is open again
Fourth time I had to be woken up in the line of Whataburger in two weeks. First time my shirt was free of vomit.
How was your 8:30 class today?
Non existent. I just threw up in my water bottle on the bus.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
I found your wallet in my underwear drawer......... Don't worry I don't plan on asking any questions
threw up on my 7.30 AM placement test. Never again
I have just gotten home. I saw a lot of penis tonight. On a trampoline. Shit got weird.
You're an asshole. I don't want your dick as my background. I'll look like I have a thumb fetish.
hurry up this bar wont let me order big pitchers of beer for just myself
Also.. The Hobbit does not look like a cartoon. We were just too fucking high.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Know anything about my roof collapsing last night?
Tequila.
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
He's UNCIRCUMCISED. And it curves. Two things I've never encountered in all my sluttiness and they're both on the hottest guy alive. :(
Randomize