there's a guy here who looks like a hipster got a hold of obama and gave him a makeover.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
what part of “beer fountain” do you not understand
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Boobs speak an international language.
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
Say what you will, but only I can throw up on someone's door and make it look like art.
That's the last time I'm letting you drink that apple vodka
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Please come to class. I miss you and I have a horse mask
Randomize
