Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
my text book just quoted the cookie monster
HAPPY NEWYEARSM FAGTRON! GETTING HEAD IN TAXI I WIN
i wasn't going to tell her about the threesome but i had to explain the tree and the green paint everywhere
Dude he's your dog he doesn't love me more than you. I'm just like that cool uncle that takes him to burger king and to see girls.
Well it's a moot point because I did have a sink & I peed in it.
If he shows up in a "mount n dew" me shirt im throwing him to the lesbians
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
There were containers of weed in the piñata. How much more Colorado does it get
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
Stop it. You know what r&b does to my body
Whoever jacked off in MY pong room on the bean bag with your fucking googles pick up your fucking cum towel you gross disgusting fucks. I said NO MORE jacking off in that room. I swear I will empty it out if this is going to continue.
You said "I feel like a koala bear. Do you ever just feel like a koala bear?" This is your brain on drugs.
They tried to get you to drink water and all you kept shouting was, "NO MORE LIQUIDS OF *ANY* KIND."
Randomize
