I cant wait to get the disapproving look from this elderly black lady...
I just had to sit down with an 11 year old who threatened to dick slap a girl.
Just passed a sign for an "adult food and fuel superstore". Wtf does that even mean?
im not sure but a few things come to mind which just makes me giggle
Guys should not giggle. Ever.
We're 3 acts into this drag show and we've already run out of Lady Gaga songs.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
The first couple times was just weird, but after last night, I'm beginning to think you have a real problem banging pregnant women who are carrying someone elses child.
I think my hookup is starting to fall for me. Time to break his heart.
I'm starting a point system. For every 2 beer runs i do for u slackers i get a free bottle of Barefoot.
I'm laying in bed listening to Purple Rain on repeat. If you wanna bone, come up, but if not, at least Prince understands me.
He was making Jim beam nachos. Chips soaked in whiskey with cheese
Thanks for launching me off you reverse cowgirl. I think I chipped a tooth.
Like how hard is it to come up to me with chocolate and wine and say "hey, you're beautiful. Wanna marathon Doctor Who in sweatpants?" Hell yes!
Our breakfast options are microwave popcorn, wavy lays and fireball
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
