im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
I just want to make him a cookie cake that says "you have no chance with me."
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
So we stole all of the newspapers out of the stands within a 1 mile radius and filled up her car with crumpled newspaper.
Who leaves their car unlocked at night?
Someone who wants to read the newspaper.
you opened the fridge, pissed on the food, fell over, then threw up on yourself. thats whats all over the kitchen.
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
I may or may not have traded sexual favors for Disney on Ice tickets.
hanging out with you guys is like living the wikipedia entry for drugs...not sure i can handle that tonight.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
omg his dad is hot
... I'm currently away at the moment. Leave a msg since I cannot express how much I can't help you stop ruining peoples lives.
Oh wow and I have a bunch of portable wine glasses called to go coffee cups
My mom just busted me rolling a blunt on her bathroom counter. ...all she said was fuck it it's Christmas
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Randomize
