I think men at large are the problem in most or all relationships. It's like trying to drag a three-legged retarded puppy through an obstacle course
he started yelling "this is my pussy" mid thrust
He famously once noted that women should wear white "like all other domestic appliances,"
Somewhere in this world my second husband is in 9th grade.
bottle of wine in one hand cigar in the other. 5 am. topless on our fire escape. and she cleaned our bathroom... i like his new girlfriend.
he said he has something really important to tell me but isn't ready yet. It's either that he loves me or has herpes
i feel like everytime i say im going to quit drinking someone comes along with a better idea about drinking
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
Fuck it dude, we gotta bounce before she starts talking about her steve irwin conspiracy
u got into a flexing contest with a dude in bathroom in the mirror at the club
You picked a jagger girl up claimed her then walked out the door with her that was the last we saw of you
I spent part of my valentines extracting candy hearts from a woman's vagina. The entire time I was thinking "this job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes. This job pays for my Mercedes."
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
HE GAVE ME ONE OF HIS BEERS.
YOU'RE THE CHOSEN ONE.
I'm so glad I can be everyone's guide to the world of fucked up kinks
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