North Korea, Best Korea!
South Carolina's governor once cited "moral legitimacy" when he was a congressman voting for President Bill Clinton's impeachment. Karma is a bitch.
He just asked me if I ever had the urge to put a zucchini in my ass.
I think "bars open christmas minneapolis" is the saddest google search i've ever done.
He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.
She said I had the biggest dick she'd ever seen. And when you consider how many she's come in contact with, it's kind of like winning the heisman.
Her grandmother had a handicap stair lift. I just put her drunk ass on it and let her ride it up. Thank God for broken hips.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
well you're talking about the girl who after 4 years, several relationships and several fuck buddies, has yet to have sex in an actual bed
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
I found him passed out against a dryer in the girls washroom, in front of an old woman was trying to figure out how to dry her hands.
I'm the man of the house if we're referring to livers.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I just walked across town, stoned off my ass and barefoot in 35 degree weather for him to bust five mins in and then apologize 13 times as I got dressed.
Randomize
