I successfully cooked a taquito with a lighter! My stomach hurts now tho.. im either guna blame it on the undercooked taquito or im feeling guily about porkin my brothers gf a lil bit ago
Mat is currently running around his basement "trying to catch oxygen in his mouth."
nah, shes just mad because we went through all her fb pics and tagged her crotch as all the guys shes fucked
soooo we both peed the bed last night...
we're at Rob's house and just invented the best drinking game ever....we are on Chatroulette and everytime we see a dick we all have to drink.
the only time i'm productive on weed is when i drink.
Dear Derek. I would like to offer my sincerest apology for the 2 to 6 text messages you are about to read. Also for the 15 minute voicemail, which may or may not have sent. Sincerely, Sober Katie
He woke me up at 3 am kneeling on the floor pissing and yelling, then he passed out and stole my comforter. I want a new roommate...
Just pure bliss will emerge from Charles, my tranny bong.
You had the nerve to crowd surf to your own bedroom.. I guess watching Aladdin high was probably the best idea ever
Thank you. Next to bondage, soft American Apparel t-shirts are the best things you've taught me about.
i fell into a bathtub last night and broke the fall with my forehead. my forehead is bruised
Also, we found a geriatric Snoop Lion.
I threw up in my room. And I cleaned it up with a spatula.
Nice. I like it when Maker's Mark makes decisions for you.
Randomize
