I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
It's mornings like this that make me happy to have a clean pair of underwear in my purse.
remember that response paper i wrote naked, at 745am still drunk with a naked dude in my bed? yeah, totally got an a- on that. and he loved my insight.
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
After I gave him a handjob for a half an hour he told me I should be a taxidermist. I'm gonna take it as a compliment.
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
why is it ever time u get laid i end up having to clean something twice? you have no idea how hard it is to wash smugged ass cheeks off the counter
there not mine if that helps
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
It's whatever. I just want to see his dick again
Check snapchat. Selfie game still on point mid vomit.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
You spent the whole night conversing with your zombie poster, so I'd say you were pretty far gone.
You "drove" the computer chair around the party for a good fifteen minutes. you would crash into things, freak out, and yell for an ambulance.
Seriously if we go to rome ur fucking me into the sunset on a wrought iron balcony overlooking Vatican City
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
