He asked me if I "almost moaned"
First thing I heard on the radio when I got in the car: "humans and dinosaurs used to live happily together"... I need to stop listening to Christian radio...
I will give you a bj if you get me food. NOT A JOKE. FREE BJ.
No one wears that much makeup to work unless they are trying to fuck their boss, NO ONE
Freshman just walked up and thanked me for letting him hide under my bed when the cops showed up to the house last weekend
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
I slept with him that night and I'm not sure if my lack of enthusiasm was obvious but I found him eating ice cream in the bathtub the next morning. Mom will be so proud.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
So what if I got a tattoo on a bus, it was sterile.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
but if we have a President Trump come Tuesday, I might throw myself off the Walt Whitman Bridge so Thursday might not work for me after all.
Randomize
