I think I just sold my virginity for plane tickets
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I wish we were homeless so drinking on the streets was acceptable.
He'd bedazzaled his ass. Im not even that gay...
i'm going to look back at this as the time of my life when i casually dated that autistic guy
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
She was shaking her boobs and I was so high all I could think was "breast maracas"
I remember telling you it was cold out because the sun was going to explode and people were going to fight for corn. I feel I've mislead you.
Woke up this morning on my doorstep in a basket with a branch, a lipstick lightning bolt on my head and a sign that said "the boy who lived." i love you guys.
The guy I met last night said we had a real connection and gave me his AA coin because he met me during his relapse
I want someone to sweep me off my feet and you want someone to fuck you on the kitchen table. They're both perfectly logical needs.
I want to fuck the side burns off of Steve.
He did 5 five hand stand push ups and took off his shirt for a barbarian flex. Some girl took off her shirt and threw it at him
Well, we ended up labeling the relationship. We are now each other's designated butt-toucher.
I sucked his dick by a creek, how romantic.
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