I'm really into asian looking animals
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
After I saw you grinding on that guy with your shirt completely unbuttoned, I figured it was time for pizza.
He tried to slow-dance with me in bed. IN BED.
One girl peed the bed, one lost her panties, another woke up on the piano, I have pink eye and door knobs are missing. This is why I stay in Nebraska
Do you think I should still be the condom fairy for Halloween even though I'll be like.. Almost 8 months pregnant?
I'm gonna chug this bud light an might injure this high school penis, like I'm 17 again
She's licking the whiskey out of the carpet. I think we may be soulmates.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
She’s the kind of asshole whose face I want to put on a T-shirt just so I can go outside and burn it.
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