White coat. Heels.
His facebook says he is a fan of "underwater handjobs"
oh dear god, that would be like watching to female walruses mate. We need to stop going to that lesbian bar...
I have Denny's hours of operations written on the palm of my hand....not in my writing, in a girls writing, is that as good as or equal to a cell number?
I BIT YOU IN THE DINING ROOM. I bit you and you crunched
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
There is nothing wrong with me introducing you as elephant dick. Nothing.
I figure even if it starts out as just sex I can bang him into loving me
Apparently it's not a "bonding moment" when you realize you use the same porn site as your boyfriend
I have a corndog on my dresser and a trashcan of puke. Thanks for a great night!
Oh my god. We just got locked out of our cabin and went to the neighbor's to see if they had a key and caught the neighbor jerking it. My night > your night
She paid me 300 bucks to spank her and call her Baby Jane. Then we drank half a bottle of sippin whiskey. I'd call it a twelve out of ten.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
You had a good week dude, you bought a motorcycle and a beer bong with ur parents money, missed 2 classes, and ran from security twice, good first 2 days to college
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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