I think getting shot is the thing to do in Brooklyn
Every morning i wake up and check his twitter like a horoscope
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
Dude its barely eleven am and there is already a firetruck and ambulance at the shamrock...happy st paddys day
Apparently I kept telling people I was a pro tennis player again...
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I'm about to sell my hamster for weed money I'll call you in a few
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
SHE WON'T ROUND UP MY GRADE! I have a 79.8% I ONLY MISSED TWO CLASSES!!! ONE WHEN I GOT DRUGGED AND ONE WHEN MY CAR GOT BROKEN INTO!! I'm interculturally competent. I used to date a Italian/Cherokee Indian. I fucked a Palestinian. How much more pro-peace can you get?
i would rather have had this happen at a time when i wasnt tripping out on shrooms
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
The universe is cradling this hangover like a gay couple cradles their newly adopted chinese baby.
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
It has now been 10 days since we last saw Sebastians penis
Do you ever just want to be mashed potatoes?
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