Blackout barefoot maybe pregnant
Good decisions....
Just got blue box Mac and cheese things are looking up
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
Someone should tell Glenda that I only hang with her because she makes me look prettier.
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
I can't believe I wasted a google wave invite on her.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
God I love babysitting. They pay me $10 an hour to watch movies and sext
well other than the faint smell of fireworks in the truck you can't really tell the windshield was exploded
Just spent 15 minutes trying to save the life of a fruit fly that dive-bombed my coffee. I figured it doesn't make sense to let two souls die in this place...
I could barely talk to the cabbie and I was text bombing everyone. They need to make an auto timer app to prevent people like me from belligerent late night harrassing. And I was seeing double... Prob would have tried to give your leg a bj and then fallen down the stairs.
No. Not going out tonight. No. It's Tuesday. Xanax and Full House Tuesday.
I just did a walk of shame on my own block. one of the old neighbors saw and greeted me "good morning, girl next door"
You need to get out of there before he falls in love with you.
I think i got beer on your cat.
Randomize
