You were so trashed that when you dropped your fruit rollup on the floor, you just sat next to it and cried.
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
i got shots of sambuca dumped on my head last night. my bag still smells like licorice. making me nauseous.
it is a nice little reminder of the bruins dominance. if Vancouver had won, it would somehow smell of maple syrup.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
Listening to Whitney Houston sing the National Anthem while I shit before going out tonight. America.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
While randomly hooking up with my neighbor last night he says "it's okay we're neighbors".
And my parents said I crawled through the house
I think we can say happy hour is successful when you have frosting and southern comfort in your hair.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
another side note: i'm officially selling my underwear on the internet
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
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