Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
tried unsuccessfully for 10 minutes to do bong hits while wearing glow in the dark vampire fangs before realizing air was getting out of the sides of my mouth
i've met an abundance of virgins and guys who where flip flops, i thinks there's a correlation
it took you forty minutes to realize it was a gay bar.
He thinks that since we have been dating six months, that he can do the helicopter with his penis. Not okay.
I cleaned out the fridge, had to pound the brews. I am going to be wrecked for my final at 1
I'm chugging Gatorade because i drank something called a trashcan and someone named Gianna diamond has my credit card number, and I think I might have ruined my life.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
I feel like everyone in class can tell we had a threesome last weekend.
It was like coming out my mothers vagina again in slow motion
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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