dude i was like still drunk, taking pictures of her while she was naked and asleep and she woke up
haha what'd she say
i don't know man, something about us dating. but i never talked to her sober so i said i was making breakfast and snuck out of her house. close calls man WTF
Dudeeeee, i ordered strippers for my party.
I ordered a moonbounce.
Fuck, you win.
These 5 days benders will be the death of me. Just living and breathing is a struggle right now.
If I die tonight. Just know that chicken I made fuckin ruled. Recipe: Chicken with a shitload oF spice
Ok, maybe I don't want to know what happened last night... But somehow I guess I moved the oven.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I still can't believe he came down from his hiding place in the tree voluntarily because he didn't want us to have to talk to the cops alone...
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
Remember last time I drank with my mom? I asked if I got my dick sucking abilities from her.
This is what happens when wu tang raised you
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
Monday afternoon and I'm still hungover from Valentine's Day. I think I'm winning at the single life.
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
I gave him breakup sex, AGAIN
Randomize
