My milkshake brings 85 to 90 percent of the boys to the yard
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
5 out of the 6 of them cut their hands while trying to shot gun the beer, I had never seen balls attached to such patheticness
Lightning struck the tree right outside of her window as I came inside her. I think its God's way of saying go by plan b.
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
I just sent her mug shot out in a mass text because I hate her and her cocaine eyes are hilarious.
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
We shall study the pictures later and see if his penis is worth my time.
#1- I went to button my shirt only to find they were all mising. #2- I'm so fu@king sore I feel like I was sweating to the oldies all night. #3- this pounding headache I have, I blame solely on Jennifer. Everyone sounds like Billy Mays when they talk. I remember nothing from last night, I'm concerned.
i was really disappointed no one would drink beer from our cleavage last night except for us
You had sex with a mute, how is that not funny
Tonight we learned that just because we can fit a Tic Tac in the tip of my penis that does not mean we should.
MY LIFE IS HARD OK. I HAVE TO WAKE UP AT LIKE 10 OR 11 AFTER SMOKIG POT AND PLAYING FALLOUT UNTIL 3
He was semi blacked out in the hallway with a bucket, calling for me while I had sex with his best friend in the very next room. Why do you let me do these things?
You know you're out of shape when you're sore after masturbating.
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