he invited me to an all week drinking party at his house. apparently he knows the key to my heart is booze shaped.
if all i could do was poop and smoke weed, i'd be eternally happy
amen to that sister
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Mark is going to get hypothermia. he is shirtless eating snow bc he "doesnt want to be dehydrated" tomorrow. youre in charge.
I put the extra pregnancy test in my sex toys box as a reminder that my actions have consequences.
not much just sitting outside his bathroom door naked eating cheetoes. You?
Note to self: semen does not count as food to take medicine with
I didnt realize how badly my legs were scratched up from power-fucking him in the bushes until kate dumped a bottle of vodka on me. that shit burnedddd
I just KNEW this was gonna happen. NEVER say "all the free Jameson you can drink" around Tina.
Good morning! Or after noon. Sorry for falling asleep in you
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
Why were there just 3 inflatable bounce houses delivered to my house?
oh shit.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Oh please. Preoccupy yourself with my penis.
Randomize
