if she leaves who will i have to secretly talk about behind thier back
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Claiming territory at this party means signing a girls ass...I've got dibs on a blonde
I may have just unintentionally roofied a man in a wheelchair
I give you full permission to fuck a rando on my air mattress.
Dude she said she'd let me snort a line off her ass now I just have to wait for them to break up
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
Remember that time you came over to my house and I was on the porch naked and eating peanut butter?
So again no comment on the cleavage. I'm a bit disappointed. If those girls come together to make cleavage AND I send you a pic of it, you have to comment on it. That's like relationship 101.
God gave me a talent besides one night stands. I feel like I should use it
It was literally 8 o'clock in the morning. His horniness knows no bounds.
You know you went through something intense when you actuallu applaud yourself for not shitting your pants
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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