yah I made NO friends last night. at one point i think i replaced talking with spitting
you kept trying to convince me i had aids because my head hurt
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
so we were having anal, both very very drunk when he started shouting his roomates name
I bought a nasal spray, my nose needs to be in order by the weekend
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
There was enough sluts here for 2 threesomes to happen at the same time, and you still struck out. What did you do to piss off karma so much?
Just got offered a dog by two Meth head's one of which wasn't wearing shoes and continually saying "fuck"
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
His flight is delayed. Mother Nature is delaying me from sex.
Lets think Pancakes and sausages into existence
She came so hard that after she finished, she started a slow clap and then told me she pulled a muscle.
if you're the one who put those dollar bills in my bra last night, thank you because I just used that money to get myself a coffee
Current state of being: shivering like a new born kitten on the bathroom floor
looked it up online and zoo tickets are only 20 bucks and there's also a museum of science close to the hotel.
i'm not going to a FUCKING museum. i want to be wasted and possibly double penetrated... have you EVER been on vacation?
Randomize