Kind of a slow process. Played 9 holes with her yesterday. Wish one of them was hers
yah i'm on my way- is everything ok?
i'm holding a walmart bag of my own hot vomit that i closed up with some random chicks hair tie. we r pretty fucking far from ok
my ex gf has sooo many hot friends... i feel like im at a grocery store when on her fb... just shopping around.
Im so hungover that my 6 year old cousine made me aspirine and coffee out of playdoh...
Would you want me to push you down the stairs OR throw you a baby shower?? Real talk
Could someone please kill snooki before she contributes to the gene pool.
I no longer question where these bruises come from... between the strip pole in the living room, the slipnslide in the hallway and our constant level of intoxication I will always be bruised...
You should make it a point to use vocabulary that is competition appropriate around him, like "champion" and "training" and "victory sex"
I don't even care that his girlfriend will be there. Us hooking up is a tradition and she will NOT ruin it.
That's where the buck stops? Buying girlfriends online? THAT is where you draw the line?!
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
I told him we could fuck whenever was concurrent for both of us
Plus he is a pilot so I could give him flight dome
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
