I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
i think the bruises are from the grocery store. on separate occasions. i've been spending a lot of time drunk at the market lately.
i have a vague recollection of being in the parking deck around 4 this morning, and on monday morning i was naked on the roof.
that would mean it's on tape
Please tell me you're throwing the cats into this foot of snow.
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
I had to brake up with him.
In my experience drinking helps.
You dont want to know why?
Not really. I want to drink.
I baptized my dog in my pool last night because he snapped at my party guests, how was your night?
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
So I woke up with a terribly bandaged finger an then discovered a pot of bloody onions on the stove.....who the fuck decided it was a good idea for me to try and cook
The first crop top of the year and you're rocking it in the ER. #ratchet
What is my life?
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
She was so happy for me that she insisted I fuck her with my Bills jersey on. THAT ACCOMMODATING
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
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