I think I kinda wanna bone that ginger from Harry Potter.
You literally just made my flesh crawl.
I tried karate at age 7 and quit after realizing it conflicted with watching new episodes of "Full House."
I got drunk and smashed his tv with the keg and so he blames me for being evicted.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I'm gonna vom. In the dentist chair. Who makes a dentist appt for July fucking 5th.
Clearly he doesn't understand my need to be surrounded by cats at all times
Look, if he's not the brother with three nipples, I'm just not interested.
I paid your cover too so you're on the list as tits mcgee. You're welcome :D
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
I am here to underwhelm you with my vagina
It was right before we played jenga with champagne glasses for a good half hour
was it wrong to tell him he's welcome in my pants any time?
The ride home was alright, we hooked up in the street next to his car after he smashed into the guard rail
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Randomize
