Being 21 is my favorite hobby I'm really good at it
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
omg. don't know how to spell his name, but hot new zealand guy's dick is magic
craigslist free llama. are you in or are you in?
incase your class ends early, there are three naked guys in our room. but don't get too excited, they're all gay.
He apologized for his naked psychotic episode and then we had goodbye sex on his sailboat
planned ethnic drinking holidays while bored at work thru next may. I don't suppose you have any scots or russian in you?
What's standard gratutity for someone having a miscarriage on stage at a strip club? It's important.
I woke up at 4 am to my roomate peeing all over my clean laundry. He thought he was in the bathroom and yelled at me for being in the bathroom with him while he was peeing.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
I just had to kick out lesbian wedding crashers. They literally wanted to punch me. I threatened to call the cops so they went outside and smoked a joint.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
Hey, before I head out, whats your policy on casual drug use and one night stands?
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Randomize
