I would kick you in the vagina but I'm afraid I would lose my shoe.
she's got that wholesome 16 and pregnant look.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
You have proved your worthiness to join me on the quest of taking shots at every academic building on campus by showing up drunk to our test at 12:30 today
I am trapped in a bar with french tattooed drug dealers who also blow glass art. Just in case this is bad, know what happened.
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
you were stumbling down richmond carrying a girl in a nurse costume. its not even halloween dude
So I got hit in the face with a frying pan. So def wont be at work for first break if I'm there at all
This is kind of a weird question but were you the other girl Ben asked to do a group sex thing with?
hell or highwater he WILL get a blowjob in the hammock before the end of summer.
I have already been up, showered, had a cup of coffee brought to me, added a little rum to cure the hangover, had sex and kicked him out and it's only 1pm. Successful day so far.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I woke up uncovered, spread eagled to my dad saying "you really need to stop sleeping naked."
Just finished 151. Eating nutella off a spoon. Bring condoms.
Randomize
