It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
I'm literally partying with O.J. Simpson's son right now. I don't know what to make of this.
Well at least he stopped keeping track of money by bottles of McCormick.
and you think what you did last night was bad? at least you didnt go wake up a sleeping guy for birthday sex.
judging from the lines on my body they wheeled me back in a shopping cart
Saw someone get laid in the bathroom no one was wearing shoes and I had a parrot on my shoulder...I never want to leave this bar
Wheres my essay?
You mean the vodka drenched shreds of paper taped all over the walls of the hallway?
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
I'm going to teach Troy such valuable life lessons. Yesterday I told him to stay away from girls who drink redbull and vodkas.
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
I should stop pointing to my vagina when I say "I'm in charge!"
Sitting on couch, workout sex makes me more sore than regular workout
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
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