He's been sleeping iwht ***
Nooo
Yeah I don't even know how, she looks like her mom smoked crack while she was in the womb
And then hit her in the face with a shovel
I want to do you till i cant cum anymore. Till all i get is a little flag that says "bang".
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
She told you broke her computer after the little square in tetris wouldn't rotate for you...
It doesn't matter if I tell the story beginning to end or end to beginning, the story still starts with a random girl blowing me in the bathroom.
She Kept going around and squirting jello shots into guys mouths. That was her ice breaker.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
And there was a legally blind kid in a ref costume doing surprisingly well at beer pong who was passing out business cards
I'm wearing too many socks to be ok with this.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
Ok. You have started something that can only end with a picture of the inside of my butthole. It may happen today or next year, but it's on my agenda.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
The cops high fived after they tackled you
Well, for starters, you were growling and slurping beer from a puddle on the carpet. Let's all hope that was beer...
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