i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
8th day he invented the big mac, 9th he invented pop rocks, 10th day boobs.
That guy youre talking to looks like Brian from Family Guy.
i hope chris hansen doesn't have a boat
I only had sex with her cause she looked like jwoww from jersey shore
So, after having sex with my 4th overweight girl in 2 weeks, I've decided Charlie Sheen syndrome is ruining my life.
Is there anything medically wrong with drinking beer from a vagina?
How did the beer even get there in the first place?
That's not what's important right now
The bar posted my picture because my name changes with each new fake i get. i'm getting a wig.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
Some guy in lab is humming along to a Sara Barrilles song. Or maybe I'm just hearing the song echoing in his huge, gaping vagina.
I was grossed out that all their candles smelled like vagina and then I remembered where my fingers had been.
he was high. i was rolling face. we were both wearing grateful dead t shirts. at that point it's like we had no choice but to fuck
The hospital waiting room is starting to become a very familiar place to me.
After I spend a passionate night with my vibrator, I have to awake and face my stuffed animals. Their beady eyes are full of shame and disappointmet. I can't deal with that level of judgement.
That would involve putting on clothes and I don't think I can face that right now.
Randomize
