Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
literally the only thing you kept saying was "i wish i had a beer keg vending machine that accepted hugs as payment" and everytime you said it you rubbed the urn her grandmother's remains were in
I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"
Sorry I fell asleep again. I'm in the shower now. Door is unlocked. Condoms are in my desk. I want your game face on for when I get out.
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
Do you have any pics of the gummy penis incident?
I chugged that bitch with a dip in.
You somehow managed to be a man whilst drinking a Mike's Hard. I commend you.
I am praying to every god I can that he drank so much that he won't even remember me
I'm not kidding, he literally jumped in the red panda exhibit. I knew this was gonna be a good birthday.
I seriously feel like I just crawled out from under a shit covered rock. I'm NEVER drinking like that again...well, not for alteast a solid 3 hours.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
Randomize
