You wouldn't stop crying and screaming Hilary Duff doesn't deserve Gossip Girl
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Are you still giving blowjobs?
Who is this?
He walked me home last night across campus while i fed him pasta out of a solo cup at 3 am.
I didn't want to have to tell you this, violating our brother/sister code not to discuss these things but: for the love of christ stop inviting that 21 year old idiot I slept with for six months to EVERY PARTY WE THROW.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
I'm closer to stabbing a fork in my neck than finishing this resume.
they saw the dick pic he sent and started calling him 'subway'
He just ranted to some customer about fourth of July being ruined and I just shouted USA the whole time in the background. It was kinda epic
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Alternately I could tell him western classical is just a series of events that had to happen for music to reach the point where Beyoncé was able to pen drunk in love, which is the pinnacle of humanity's artistic achievement thus far
Did we just second hand smoke crack?
He's the first boyfriend I wouldn't cheat on. This is a really big deal for me
Of course he did! You’ve seen my tits, you know he didn’t stand a chance!
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