oh wait, my morality sensor is a little fucked up since I almost let my little sister's friend blow me.
What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
I looked her in the eye and told her I was 'balls deep' in love with her...She said that wasn't saying much. Time to drink away the sadness...
Have you ever seen a porn where they were playing bluegrass in the background?
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
She climbed through the window and into my bed. Not even sure who she is. Was thinking she might be a friend of yours?
You yelled "hold my dick" before you tackled the guy away from the dj and two random girls moved to actually hold it, then argued about it. I want that whore aura!
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I'm not sure if I should be proud of you for having morals or disappointed in you for letting your sex life get this sad.
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
You took motorboating me in public to a whole new level. You poured your beer down my top and LAPPED IT UP.
Randomize