Would it be quicker to bike the freeway home?
I think I'm going to inject the gummy vitamins with vodka
I'm glad you're using your medical degree for some good for once
Also pencil in smooth jazz and illegal activities. The usual.
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I just spewed blue gatorade in the shower. It looked like the ocean.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
My relaxing drive may end up as a surprise bootycall in Pittsburgh. Don't try to stop me.
Just sponge bathed with a swissper. Thrush inevitable. Shaking.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The amount of alcohol I'm going to consume on my birthday is directly proportional to the amount of shit I've had to put up with this past year. Which is a lot.
I take your giggles as a yes to operation McLaxitives?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Ahaah! I just stole batteries from work for my vibrator. I am that person.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
