By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
Most fantastic sex ever until her Doberman took an interest in what we were doing. There was nothing more terrifying then feeling warm dog breath on my ballsack.
There is a pink thong attached to a bottle of svedka hanging from my ceiling fan..is this yours?
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
yeah they are definitely having sex in that car. joe just yelled through the window telling them to do the "titanic hand print thing"
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Officially drug you out of White Castle last night by the hood on your sweatshirt after you cussed out the attendant and stole the satisfaction guaranteed sign because they were closed!
And then we felt it necessary to continue drinking for another 4 hours, yikes
Are you setting a date to bone me?
Are you accepting?
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
These tits shall not be calmed
She was wearing a grass skirt and a watermelon bra. WATERMELONS.
He passed out before we could have sex. I had no choice but to use his boner to hold my onion rings.
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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