Getting food. Want anything?
Vagina. Double meat no buns. I have the secret sauce
Dude, just got a bummer.
What??
A blow job from a homeless chick.
When my kids ask how I lost my virginity Im going to have to tell them of a mythical thing called "Myspace" and how strangers could lure you into their "den of love" thanks to clever quotes and graphics
She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
please come get me his dick is out. i'm sitting on his couch and his dick is out. come now
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
I made a tournament bracket for the girls that Im talking with.
Okay, just a casual question: how did i manage to get grass stains on the inside of my bra?
He tried to stick it in and I asked him what he wanted to name our child and he quit.
until he told me my vag was like a juicy apple and he loved eating it, yes, i really did think we were both sober.
tried doing a cartwheel after 10 beers. Guess who has a dislocated shoulder.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
First she snuck beer into the movies and then proceded to give me a handjob in the dark theatre. I think I'm in love
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