You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
bet u 5 dollars u can't guess were i woke up this morning
oh god.. jail?
better, on the catwalk of the auditorium
hahahahaha your sister just walked down from the guest house with a stain on the front of her shirt and "owned" written in blue sharpie on her forehead. i dont think she knows what happened last night either.
This will be amazing. Plus he's going to do a line of cocaine off of the other guy's ass.
you told that cab driver that when the 3 of us come togehter it means happiness and love
He had a joint rolled for us when he picked me up. It's how ASU does romance
I feel like I'm going to get the reputation of being the girl who brings her dog with her to all her random hookups.
wow. there is a man who hates the post office more than me. he is causing a scene, this is a snapshot of elderly me.
future reference: when you get a text that says "WARNING: EXPLICIT PHOTOS BEING DELIVERED. VIEWERS DISCRETION IS ADVISED." you always open the attached picture.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
I felt like I should've driven him home but I was holding in a fart and just needed him to leave
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I taught three men with PhDs how to make a gravity bong last night. I love academia.
im just letting you know I walked in on you with four different guys last night. a. you were all naked. b. they're all roommates
Randomize
