One of her kids, Dakota I think, got stuck in a ceiling fan and she had a fit, thats when she found the penis hat.
My mom just informed me that my dog licks their toes while her and my dad are having sex. I'm apartment searching.
im holly from the hills drunk
im at a party in sweatpants, slippers, and a basketball jersey from the eighth grade, 10 bucks says im still getting laid
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
I feel like my vagina stays drunk longer than the rest of me. It's always super sensitive and hungry the day after drinking.
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
Also, if you all get arrested i'm coming to laugh at you because i don't have the money for bail.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Getting your clit pierced is not something you want to trust to a crazy girl with an ice cube, some vodka, and a sewing needle. Trust me. I learned that the hard way.
Like when I see him I look straight through his appearance and just envision a big walking penis.
I had to google some of the kinky sex shit she was telling me she was into.
If that is not a reason to propose to her then I don't know what is
Randomize
