he used the word "rubber" i just couldn't do it after that.
My mom make sausages for dinner...and all I could think of was your dog's penis..
I think I should become a real estate agent in th friend zone I know the place so well
Apparently she came home completely covered in mud, pretending to be a bird...and she still had more sex than any of us this weekend.
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
After a certain blood-alcohol level, the dog is in charge.
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
I want you to get your positive energy all over me. I want to to look like something from Ghostbusters.
Halfway through the blowjob she stopped and said 'Wait I know this dick'.
You should be able to leave recommendations on Tinder.
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
sorry for pouring tequila vodka and whiskey down your throat and left you to sleep on a table
you were trying to drink the laundry detergent and yelling blue drankkkkk
I saw that he had a tattoo of a map of New Jersey on his arm, so i slowed down to like 20mph and pushed him out of the car
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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