even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
I feel if a girl leaves my house the next morning feeling degraded and in desparate need of a shower, then I have succeeded.
i was quietly enjoying my waffles when he came downstairs naked, kissed me on the forehead, and thanked me for the night before. i didnt even know anyone stayed over.
This tent reeks of fear and sangria
She sent me a map and directions for a booty call. In a park. Give me reason not to marry her.
Listen up tinkerbell, You're gonna come to the bar, hit on some fat chicks, and step up when I punch someone in the face.
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
I can't wet the bed. That was the old me. I'm grown
Oh my god
That final makes me want to drink myself into the fetal position
Remember that mom/daughter stripper team? Well i just met the ex husband/father in AA. WOW!!!! WOW....
So what's the moral standing on reading gay porn on your phone whilst sitting next to your 87 year old Grandma?
yeah, I don't think I'm getting into the baseball game tonight. The security guard definitely saw me bowl over that child.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Lady Gaga is doing the 1/2 time show. I hope it's gay and liberal as fuck.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
Randomize
