But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
the best thing about dollar beer night is beer is only a dollar.
I hid a 6pack in the microwave for later
I knew I liked you
i dont care about people's attitudes as long as they give me head
I just got an email from a bridal website with the subject "Countdown to your Wedding Day"... is 11AM too early to drink the rest of the wine we have?
I just found out that my father was a Human condom for halloween when I was 4. And to think I used to wonder where my sense of humor came from.
She was the most uninteresting drunk I've met
Passing out during sex is actually quite pleasant. its like being rocked to sleep with a penis
hey you knew what you were in for when i showed up with 2 fifths of Jim. plus i left money to pay for a new sink
I'm in Starbucks carrying the boxes wine and the hubcap. So many judging looks.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
Rough day
Good thing I've started drinking again
My sex toys have been held in customs for almost a month now. They're British, what the hell?!?
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
Some days, I wish I could get a hug from a furry muppet
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