Dude?? where did you go after Wildcats last night? Last I heard you went off with one of the girls we danced with?
Negative - This is his GF, Bobby is in Jail for a DUI. Thanks for the info.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
I'm scared. I feel like she's my mom and she just walked in on me having sex. Like she's "disappointed"
I fucked him in the bathroom at Cedar Point. if it hadn't been for me already combining my two favorite things in the world the whole bathroom thing would have been a little disgusting.
After we hooked up, he left the room and no one has seen him since last night. That kid redefined hit it and quit it.
I woke up with my keys safelty pinned to my thong. It's gonna be a great day.
if this hangover is indicative of how 2011 is gonna be, i want nothing to do with it
Im drunk on a hayride surrounded by toddlers. they are judging me.
I like to think it's an accomplishment that I can relate my life to a T-pain song
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
Can you think of a sexual word rhyming with snorkel?
I had a dream I hooked up with Post Malone. I can still smell the dream
What happened?
Vodka. Vodka happened.
Getting a smaller wine glass hasn’t changed the amount I drink—it just means I get more steps each day. Cheers to health!
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