I fell asleep next to my cousin and woke up with my hand in her pants because i though it was lisa
Do you know of any times in scooby doo when the monster turned out to be a real monster? You know not just a person?
The world needs more lipstick lesbians, if anything.
You look at her and you just know the only action she's gotten is from her tampon..
just saw a guy throwing up in the urinal at Dennys. Either he had one hell of last night or we are going to eat somewhere else
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I have way too much money in my bra to be responsible.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
Are you two whores ready for me to turn the light on so you can see what you came home with last night?
You sucked a guys dick who's name was Chad and that wasn't a sign that it was a bad idea?!
I just ate cottage cheese and went to the gym at 6 this morning...the things i'll do because I might get naked in front of a new boy
I complemented his smile, he sends me a dick pic. Seriously?
Vocabulary what?!? Shakespeare is my bitch.
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