Duck Duck Cougar?
i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
Before he took my jeans off all he said was "no hard feelings from middle school right?"
i didnt mean to paint the dog... it just kinda happened
Her breakfeast in bed consisted of half a pop tart that I didn't want, and water that I slipped birth control into... Who says chivalry is dead?
I ended up staying at a police station for being a witness in a public masturbation case..NOW do you believe me that I've never had a good St. Patrick's Day?
Worst part of blacking out... Waking up and having to do the teeth check
dude throwing a golf cart off a pier is harder than it seems!
Please tell me that chemistry equipment is for chemistry and not for producing felonies.
I bought Plan B for the first time and an interview outfit today. You could say my life is improving.
She rode my dick so hard I momentarily lost hearing. I guarantee I had the better St Patrick's.
PUT DOWN THE JOINT AND STEP AWAY FROM THE TRUSTAFARIAN
Hard not to be concerned when you call me, tell me you've discovered the secret to flying, vomit, then hang up the phone. So yes, I'm coming to pick you up.
I knew I was in for a long night after I filled the empty pinata carcass with beer, bit off the top of one of it's legs and used it as a beer bong.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
Randomize
