we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
She asked how far humans have gone into a volcano because they did in spy kids. She was serious.
I need to remember that good judgment goes out the window after the 7th shot and the 3rd Lady GaGa song.
I have no idea what happened last night, but you're the only person I remember smashing my face into. Be honored.
He got tattooed, peirced, and we're pretty sure he got rufeed by that fat chick. He was like a walking spring break stereotype.
I'm trying to find candidates for my winter break hook up. I'm going to hold auditions thanksgiving break.
I almost shit my pants in anger over your moral sanity.
I was literally convinced that the turkey wrap i was eating was keeping me alive. And i couldnt have been happier. That high.
What about.....a game of twister and....wait..nevermind. I've hit my cap for sexualizing things today.
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
He told me my outfit made me look like a twelve year old then proceeded with "but you don't look like a whore"
yyyea i think im gonna go get a bowl and play skyrim. And by bowl i mean something i can throw up in, not weed
I love the smell of your bedroom. It smells of a mixture of cherries, leather, and unrequited homosexual desire.
Definitely ended up doing Coke with Chewbacca in the porta potty behind the haunted house.
i'm the most scandalous girl at stop and shop. i kinda have to fuck him in the meat cooler.
Randomize