Need sex. Gaining weight.
And no, shaving doesn't make it look bigger, either
If you made a robot out of pillows would he be nice? It's hard to imagine a mean pillow robot. And who came up with the idea of shaving their legs?
i'm sorry if your life is a sore subject
He was like an evil genius with the clitoris. I don't stand a chance.
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
THIS NIGHT WILL NOT GO DICKLESS
It started with jello shots. It ended with tears.
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
His parents know me as "the white shoed screamer"
You know I'm having a rough day when I'm curled up in the corner eating Spaghettios.
Rome wasn't built in a day - my bedroom skills weren't obtained in some boring monogamous relationship. Same thing. Right?
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
Randomize
