Don't threaten to terrorize my ass hole unless you have to wherewithal to back it up
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
He motorboated me, gave me a business card that said congratulations on my motorboat, then disappeared into the night.
Find him and marry him.
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
If I had feelings, you would have hurt them.
I just woke up on my neighbors floor with my boots on, but no pants. I have 3 separate taco bell receipts in my pocket.
He told me that he'd ride his snowmobile from Cincinnati to Toledo in this blizzard just so I could give him head.
He usually doesnt care about me cumming but last night he really tried, I feel that him going to the Womens March benefitted my sex life
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
My feet surprised me
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
The ass gains better be worth it
Two words: nipple clamps
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