well it doesn't count as a walk of shame if he drops you off at your class in his golf cart
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
Also, the drinking age in Japan is 20. At what point in the sky am I allowed to start downing alcohol?
I only remembered where urgent care was because it's across the street from my favorite bar
will i regret this in the morrning? probably. but every decision is good during happy hour
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
Douche bag was crowd surfing, sack punched him. Crowd carried him away in a ball of agony. LIFE=COMPLETE.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
So you get idea of what my night was like, I woke up this morning and the back of my head was orange
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
I am so not sober enough to have a 5 minute conversation in Spanish
I never truly understood the phrase ball is life until I started having to balance NBA finals and all these men with balls i'd like to handle.
Randomize
