So someone put the baby mannequins in sex positions
Ugh, here's a dating tip. Hairy legs are a major turn off
she moaned out jack bauer's name while i was banging her...
sorry i was making out with matt didn't mean for it to sound like that. there was no tone
there should be a new saying, don't text and tongue
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I'm starting to blur the boundary between reasonable senioritis and self-destruction. Somewhat-openly hittin the flask in 11am class
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
You can't be friends with my side piece. Conflict of interest.
Is her dick bigger than yours?
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
I need to start dating older women. We tried sexting and she used more emojis than actual words. It was so bad that I did the math...her messages were 54% emoji. No one should make me feel this old when I'm only 28.
I just bought two 8 Balls of Coke from the chick nurse that stitched my leg together in the ER after my bike accident last summer.
Randomize
