Why is it that every time I type the word "give" my phone spells out HIV?! You know how many people i've told I want to HIV them something!
Theres this tee in the mall and it says all girls just wanna have safe sex. U make me think thats a lie
I'm glad you talked me out of that flying penis tattoo.
The crazy thing is, I dont actually know where the cat is, she said something bout the back of the toilet and a sock.
She was narrarating everything she did.. like while making toast.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I wish I could go about my daily activities with his dick inside me
He said he wouldn't use a condom because he didn't want to kill anymore trees.
He picked up a chick with a line about the price of used cars in Sri Lanka and developing economies. Step it up.
YOU'RE CHANGING THE SUBJECT. I CAN BLOW SOMETHING UP OR I CAN TELL HIM YOU LOVE HIM, BUT ONE OF THE TWO IS BOUND TO HAPPEN
I'm getting married
To pizza
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I was told I was gorgeous and a whore by the drag queens. My night is complete.
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